I have been so full of postive and negative feelings lately. I have also been full of anxiety. The crippling stuff that wants me to just not do anything. I tell myself I'm overwhelmed because of all I have to do. Well now I don't have to do anything and Im still anxious. I decided to go jogging in the dreary grey drizzle. It sure does clear my mind for awhile. It is so important that I get some sort of exercise as it has away of clearing out just for awhile the antsy anxiety that burdens me.
I thought I wouldn't need a list for awhile and just go by muddled mind. It isn't working. I do know what I need to get done but sometimes it helps me see it in a concreate level. I know sometimes Im more into the list then the actual things I need to do and never do on the list. Sometimes, though it gives me a starting point and that is what I need when I feel overwhelmed with life. Sometimes, I just start with what is the easiest and it gives me confidence that I will get more done and it builds on it's self. Sometimes, I just need to take a break from all the crap in my life .
Today, Im going to be gentle with myself and just focus on myself. I haven't focused on myself for so long that I tend to forget my needs. My need to do something fun is great. My need to do something to escape is great. Maybe, I will just grab a book today and hopefully it will clear enough for another jog to clear out the cob webs in my brain. I could really use more outside time. I'm also enjoying my music today. I love music and today is going to be a music day and not a TV day. I'm so sick of the stuff on tv . I have to also priotize some of my projects today and hope to finish the media storage system I started to finish last night.