Here Comes Spring

I thought I would write since it has been a week or over. I haven't felt like writing with my screwed up computer. It is pretty messed up . The worst thing about it is the space bar is messed up. The cat spilled the last little drops of a soda on the keyboard. I tried cleaning it and popped off the space bar and it has never been the same. I also have many many errors on my computer. It is pretty old anyways. I could use J's but I don't want to sit in the computer room. Basically, I'm lazy and have a ton of excuses why I haven't been keeping up.

I have been busy off and on this past week with spring cleaning. I have actually enjoyed it for a couple of days. I still have tons to do. I have a lot of organizing to do and decluttering. I need to be able to get rid of stuff here so I can clear out storage and not have to pay for it. I hate paying for storage. I have became more frugal in the past 6-7 months and budject minded. I have always went back and forth with being cheap and frugal. It seems more necessary with all of our debt and bill load. Two people being bipolar can really rack up debt. It really helps living by a small town with not spending. It also helps because no one is really fashion conscious either. Keeping up with the Jones here is about who has a cool 4x4, snowmobile, huge ass dock(mine is small) , or monster house. The monster house is for the people that have a second home that they call a cottage. Who I can thank for driving up property tax around here.

I managed to order some more meat at the butchers. I ordered a front of a cow , pork and chicken. I try to order here ahead of Victoria Day as after that meat gets more expensive due to the kick off of summer and tourism. The beef hangs for 3 weeks so it is nice and aged. It is actually so much cheaper to go to the butchers and the quality surpasses anything you would get at a grocery store. I also get them to package it up in packages that 2 people would eat. It is nice to have it all wrapped up in butcher paper. No freezer burn. I can buy organic less than beef that isn't also. It really does taste a lot different. What I really love is less trips to the grocery store. I always have something on hand. I hate lugging groceries and grocery shopping. I like shopping but not for groceries.

I have also planned a trip to see my in-laws. The weather has been so miserable this winter we haven't seen them since November. My mother in law turns 91. We planned to see them for two days but will be in that town for four. It gives us time to do what we want. I'm getting excited as I haven't went this long without a mini-vacation in a long time. I depend on getting to the city. Like I have said this town is very backward. I can't even find stationary. It really is just the basics in this town. I could order on-line and I have for things. It is just not the same touching and feeling things. Also, I'm cheap and hate paying brokers fees. I try my best to shop Canadian sites but they are so lacking compared to the commerce sights in the USA. I really like being in a store though. I can't wait till this week-end even though I don't have a clue what I'm going to buy except stock up on pet food that is cheaper in that area. Also, stuff like spices that I can't find here. Basically household stuff that is hard to find or not offered. I will also be looking at computers. The prices make me choke. Even the cheap ones. The thing is I use one everyday and probably addicted to one. It really is my life line. I do everything on a computer.
I don't want to think about the cost of this upcoming trip. Even doing it on the cheap is expensive. I have been so good about not spending in the past 6-7 months. I think I will try my best but spend like I haven't in months. It scares me a little. I'm just glad they won't be having a motorcycle convention in town . I could see me coming home with one. Or they don't have a Harley store. I can blow a lot of money on clothes . I spent so much money last year in one they gave me a laptop backpack as a gift.

Well, I guess I should get busy with getting a ton done today. I have a ton to get done before we leave and just a ton of stuff that has not been done in awhile. it really makes me feel better being more active and gradually I'm coming back

Getting There

I was so depressed yesterday dealing with my emotions about Spud the dog. I guess I'm out of shock, anger and bargaining and moving into acceptance. Oh the wonderful grief process. I know life has to go on and we have two other dogs and a cat. I brushed one dog yesterday and clipped the nails of the cat as part of me taking care of them. Took one on a small walk . Trying to get back to normal whatever that is. I felt dead inside as I did all my task yesterday and going to town to go grocery shopping and do errands. Finally got my tomatoes and other things I need to finish the garden. I also got a ton of flowers as they make me happy and the more they grow I get a big delight out of it.
Today is suppose to be warm and I will get a lot done hopefully if I don't crap out emotionally and physically. I know I will gradually move on but really don't know about this flat do nothing irritable mood that is getting old. The dog really was the straw that broke the camels back. I feel paralyzed when it comes to do the things I really need to get done and just get nothing done. I have no motivation and don't have the energy to just make myself. I will repeat trudge , trudge , trudge

Procrastination

Procrastination marks my life. I finally got my media storage center done to unburden the clutter. I needed to finish it to move all the games and movies we have. When I was able to do that I could hook up the VCR-DVD transfer to get up all the old VCR movies to DVD format. I'm the gadget person. I hook up everything around the house and hook up everything.
I also finally hooked up the Wii. I have all the stuff that has been hanging around for months in their place and it looks nice. I don't know why I put it off as it was easy. I have lacked motivation for awhile. I think just taking time for myself yesterday helped promote getting things done. I also don't want to deal with my relationship problems of late. I have a lot of time on my hands now . My mood is not great and still mixed. Nothing makes it worse than sitting on my ass . I really would like to just sleep but life doesn't get better when I sleep. Here is to more things to come. I even made a list today and it built on it's self with getting things done. I clear an area and do more.