The Beat Goes On

I woke up about an hour ago and I have been checking different social media and catching up on blogs. It has been a whirlwind past couple of days and I'm tired. We have been out of town taking care of J's elderly parents. J's parents are 90. J's mother has Senile Dementia and her father has a hard time getting around. They need to be in a nursing home but won't go. I voice my concerns to J and bite my tongue in front of my in-laws. We took H the mother to get her hair done since it hasn't been done in months and she looked like a homeless person. She ended up in a panic attack at first and didn't want to go. After, we loaded her in the truck she stopped and went calmly and got her hair done. We also did all their shopping and misc around the house. For three days we where consumed by them except at night. The motel had a bar and we went there every night having three drinks until the last night. I was at my wits end and just got roaring drunk. I haven't been drunk in awhile. It made the 5 hour drive home horrible. The drinking has made my mood dull. I really need to come up with something else than drinking when we have to go to Cambridge. One good thing is I haven't much thought about my life in the past couple of days.

I have so much to do before it snows or hits November. I'm still in the process of winterizing. When the sun is up it is helpful with my mood but it is predicted to rain all next week which is going to be interesting. October is an interesting month for my mood as it is changing like the colours on the trees and blowing all over the place like the wind that cleans the tree's to a barren state. I'm hoping my mood won't bottom out next month. With the grey bare ground and bare trees where it looks like death . My mood gets flat and dead also. It is nice to know what my mood is going to do but it is also sad to know also that I will be so flat . I will try different things but it won't help that much.

Changing Tide

I have many things maturing at the moment that I'm excited about. I'm getting the house organized and getting a new couch. The gym is working out real well also and my mood is picking up. I'm also going skiing again next week also and I'm sure the exercise and loosing weight will pay off in how much more endurance I have. I have next month with several trips planned also. I'm also starting to plan my summer out and it is bright with family visiting from the states. I also have some of my own trips planned for the summer. I look forward to a season of golf and mtn. biking also. I plan on training extra hard at the gym for it also so I will get an edge on these things. It is amazing how a mood can pick up when you have so much planned and it keeps me on my toes. It is also my time of year for my mood to pick up. I will have to watch it as March is a hyper month for me. I will capitalize on getting some done while everything is all fun and games and not nasty energy, scattered thoughts and impulsive everything. I have been looking for the signs and started to medicate according since I only take pills prn.