Monday, March 29, 2010

Facebook Defreinding

I have been hibernating in the house. I have took to the couch computer and TV for the past three days. I also broke my diet for ice cream and assorted junk. I even took up an application on facebook and Im actually having fun with it. I swore off applications on facebook but I have been bored and immobile and it is a nice way to dick away the time. Talking about facebook, I had a friend of 17 years off and on defriend me. I'm hoping she just quit facebook and didn't defriend me. She hates applications and I think if your so petty to defriend someone over applications I dont need you as a friend. Hide that shit!!! I hide farmville and other things all the time. Why I care I don't know. I just don't like being defriended. It wasn't like we have been close friends for awhile and she is even sort of an ex. I guess that would define a romantic relationship for awhile . It wasn't like that more like a couple of flings that went into a friendship. I'm friends with most of my ex's. I'm not going to worry about it anymore but for christ sakes I don't understand being defriended for stupid shit. I'm almost thinking facebook is highschool again with some people.

Saturday, March 27, 2010


Today, is overcast with the sun trying to peak through. It is like the sun can't make up it's mind and come out of the big clouds. Lately, I can't make up my mind with the littlest task and it seems I'm going in circles because of my lack of concentration not pearing out of the clouds of my mind lately. Just about there like the sun but not fully out and being my brightest. They say it is spring and I haven't sprung forward yet and I'm in a little limbo like the weather not making up it's mind about what to do and what season it's in. Many times my mood reflects the seasons and the change. I feel like this is the season of limbo before things come out and grow out of the dead ground. I feel like a tiny crouscous or a daffodil trying to come out but not maturing yet to my full bloom. Trying to find the warmth and the sun to nuture it . I feel completely in limbo lately. I just can't get it together to connect the dots or form a structured rountine lately. I don't know what to blame it on but I just wish it will pass and I know it will. I hate list but I know I'm going to have to make one and actually do what needs to get done. Everything is a mess and the house is driving me crazy and needs a good cleaning. My head needs a good spring cleaning also.

Monday, March 22, 2010


I have been suffering from G.A.D (Generalized Anxiety Disorder) for the past few weeks. I just thought I had a touch of something until the dizziness, light headed, nausea and head-ache persited for weeks. When I figured it out I had to figure out what I was so anxious about and a lot of it has been just everyday living things and my family. I have started to take some prn meds and get back to my exercising and making goals toward the change of season to make my mind not think about my life at the moment and it is working. I also have been doing some deep breathing exercises. When I figured it out it was like a light switch turning off all those symptoms and just not thinking I had something worse helped also. I'm feeling much better and hope to do more with my anxiety with some behaviour things such as thinking about things in a different way and not procrastionating as much which is a big problem of mine. A lot of life is how we look at it and deal with it and I wasn't dealing with it like I should and allowing stress to build up. I'm ready to start tackling it.
Some of the links I nominated
Bipolar We Can :
Overlooking James Street
On the Ranch
Soul Surviour:
Desperatley Searching for my Inner Mary Poppins http//
I will update more later when I find 6 more.
I hope you will visit these blogs as they are fine blogs. I'm awarding breaking the rule by not posting 12 now.

Giving the Sunshine Award out

To the award winners, please pass this on to your favorite bloggers! Here are the rules:

1. Put the logo on your blog or within your post
2. Pass the award on to twelve bloggers
3. Link the nominees within your post
4. Let the nominees know they have received this award by commenting on their blog
5. Share the love and link to the person from whom you received this award

I'm so happy I won this

Friday, March 19, 2010

Spring Forward

I have been still trying to overcome this flu or whatever has been getting me down for the past 2 weeks. Now J has came down with it also. I haven't been doing much except cooking and watching tv. The weather has been so wonderful and I haven't been doing anything outside. When I do get better I will probaly do some cleaning up outside. Also, getting some of my gardening plots cleaned up also for next month. Lately, the weather teases since you really can't do much gardening outside or play golf until next month so I will soak up the rays and plan my summer and later spring. I really would prefer snow to do some more cross country skiing but the snow is almost all gone.

Saturday, March 13, 2010


I went out of town again. This time not for my hobby but for J's. I planned on today as a shopping day but with a bumbed knee I'm not in the mood. I'm a little tired of shopping anyways. I have about 4-5 hours alone today and I'm not sure what I will do.
I have a whole bag of magazines. I need to read what I bought about a week and a half ago. I haven't read any of the new reading material that I have purchased. The thing is I feel extremely restless today and feel like getting shit faced drunk. Not for any particular reason except my mood I suppose. I hate the bored restless feeling with a touch of anxiety that I get at times. Most of the time exercise will get that feeling out. I haven't been able to exercise for about a week and a half. I cant wait until this knee heals some. I did bring a computer game of scrabble along so I may work my brain a little.
Boredom I think is the worst to deal with anymore and I'm chronically bored and under stimulated. I really think it is mood as nothing can satisfy me at the moment. I better stop writing , I'm boring myself. Time to turn up the music and get myself a beer.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Murphys Law

I have been a little out of commission with a bummed knee and some sinus crud since last week. I think I tore or sprained a liagment downhill skiing. It seems to give me an awful headache standing up. My knee is real swollen also and clicks like it isn't tracking right. I'm upset to think this is going to take awhile to heal and will put me out of commission for awhile. I'm less like myself moving around in a whirlwind and exercising also. I just hope this knee wont get in my way this summer with my summer sports of golf and mtn. biking. It sure has put a dent in my mood being immobile lately. It also doesnt help having a head full of snot.
I had a week-end planned to be away this week-end and dread it now. I just want to seat around and read but probaly will have to do that somewhere else now. I want to have a good attitude but my mood is such a mess lately. I make plans and life sort has been making them for me.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010


I haven't blogged in awhile. I either have been manic,skiing or had the bug. I have been sick again with some flu bug and I'm actually thank-ful because it drains me emotionally. I have been becoming real manic and spending. I spent a load when we went skiing again. I spent enough to make me sick to my stomach and enough to stop again. I really didn't want to go skiing this time but it was ok. I have had enough till next year. Until then I will start getting involved with the gym again and start working out for golf season. It has been so unseasonable warm and I love it. I have had enough of winter now even though I love it. It is time for a different season for me and my mood will get better also with the change of season. It will level out more and I won't be all over the place. I have been all over the place and can't stay focused on one ideal. I can't connect the dots lately and it is annoying. I'm getting a little better where I can sleep through the night though and it is helping the mania deflat some. I know it will pass like anything else and it is just holding on till it goes.