Sunday, May 30, 2010


I'm very frustrated I lost a post that I wrote. I'm sorry I have been MIA for awhile but I have been very depressed. I was in between mixed and depressed when the dog died but went into a very deep depression after she died. I haven't been able to concentrate at all. I haven't been doing anything except being paralyzed with crippling depression. I stopped doing even basic things such as showering and going out of the house.
I have started a anti- depressant and feel much better but still in low grade depression. This is when I start using my coping techniques such as diet, exercise, routine and being good to myself. I wasn't able to make myself do anything but now I can. I can start coping with the horrible heat that has plagued this area. Before I was sitting depressed baking to death. We have no air as the heat isn't common for days . I think the heat made my depression worse. I'm not used to the heat without central air. I knew my depression was getting better when I started to cope with the heat and just not languish in it. I started drinking more fluids, taking cold showers, eating ice-cream. I also started to get out of the hot house and go to town by the bay where it is 10 degrees cooler. When I'm outside I have started to play in the hose like a little kid. I'm slowly getting back to normal. It isn't fast enough for me but it is coming along. I started to have goals again other than just get through the day . I will have to discontinue this anti-depressant soon as it will make me manic. I don't like either extremes. Now it is up to me to do the coping I need to do to make it back to the middle.

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