Alice

It is a lazy Sunday morning. The dogs are chewing bones. The cats are sleeping. J is watching a movie. I'm attempting to catch up with blogging after being gone for a month. I have been very busy with the new puppy this last month and just generally depressed but functioning.

I have been sleep deprived trying to house train Alice. She is about house trained. She has learned so much this month. She knows how to sit, stay, come, her name, not to bite and most importantly the word NO. She also has been learning the only thing that should be in her mouth is her toys. She also knows the word give. If I have to take something away from her, I say give and she spits it out. She is a very easy going , intelligent, playful and such picks up on so much.

I forgot how tiring a puppy is and  how they are so much work.  I was fighting depression before the puppy and had to give up my light to have my full eye on her in the morning and out the door with the slightest sign of having to go to the bathroom. She wakes up to go every morning at 4 like clock work. It has got some what better with the bathroom the older and bigger bladder she gets. I'm not putting on clothes as we are going out the door anymore in the freezing winter.

I'm back to my lamp. Someone in the question asked if I like my lamp. I actually hate it because I'm bored with light shining in my eyes making me blind for a half an hour. If I can manage to walk around half blinded or listen to the tv or radio it isn't so bad.  I just try to tell myself it is better than being depressed. I find the only thing good for my depression is when my cycle ends naturally which should happen when it gets sunny and actually spring.

The weather is very depressing. It snows and doesn't warm at all. It has been forcasted to be a little warmer this week and something as sunshine. It has been a very grey winter this year. Grey like my mood for months and I'm looking forward to sunshine and bright days. I have been planning for happier days also. I already scheduled and booked our vacation for 2 weeks this Autumn . Planned a family reunion in the summer. Casino and Comedy show at the end of  May. It is nice to get away for a night. I don't really care for casinos though as they are to busy and triggering for me. I do like them for short amounts of time though. I usually just spend about 2 hours in one and that is my limit. I generally try to just eat , play then go to the show and that is it. I recognize I can be to impulsive with gambling. I will only allow myself to blow 40 bucks and what ever I earn.

I'm starting to ramble. I think I will end now.